What is a husband list and why would you want to write one?
As a woman, you'll no doubt create thousands of lists in your lifetime. Lists for packing, meal planning, having a baby, taking a retreat, spring cleaning, daily chores and chores for the kids. Undoubtedly, the most important list you'll make is your husband list.
Now is the time to find out what God wants for you. The process for creating a husband list isn't long but it might take some time, time in prayer and meditation on what your desires are and more importantly, what God is leading you to.
Here are 4 steps to creating a husband list:
1) Seek God First
Ask God to show you what He desires for you. Turn to scripture and learn what a man with godly character is like. A man who displays godly character reflects Christ. You want a man who reflects Christ.
2) Write it out
You could keep your husband list in your head but creating a husband list in print is an important step. You can refer to it, hang it up, frame it and later in life, it can be part of your testimony of God's faithfulness.
Bonus!
Doing your Husband List with a friend is an awesome idea. Gather up your sisters or your friends and work on your husband list together. Pray with each other, encourage one another, laugh and dream as you craft a list of non-negotiable characteristics your beau must have.
3) Share It With Someone Else
Often, when someone first gives their lives to Christ they are encouraged to tell someone else. Sames goes with your husband list. Show it to a trusted friend, a mentor, your youth or small group leader or another person who you trust to keep you accountable. As Rachel mentioned earlier, it can be easy to fall for the physical and emotional aspects of a potential partner and a friend who knows your list can help keep you accountable.
4) Keep it Close
Rachel mentioned how she could mentally “check off” the things on her list as she got to know Brian. Once you've crafted it, your list will be personal, special and should live in your heart. You might not have it memorized completely, that's okay. This list should come to mind, or you should recall it anytime there's a man who piques your interest.
On Finding Perfection
The testimony you read in Rachel's story is truly amazing. God not only showed himself to Rachel in the crafting of her list and the waiting season before she met Brian but he gave her every desire of her heart in her man. Does that mean Brian is perfect? Absolutely not. Now she might disagree since they're in the pre-honeymoon stage but the truth stands, no one is perfect.
The purpose of a husband list isn't to find a man who is perfect with no flaws, faults or shortcomings. Creating a husband list helps keep you accountable to a standard that goes past physical attraction and emotion. Physical attraction is necessary for a relationship but it is not enough to carry a relationship a lifetime. While creating a husband list you are creating standards by which you will give your heart away. We were created to be joined together with someone, that someone isn't going to be a cookie-cutter replication of Prince Charming but he should be a reflection of Christ.
It's Never Too Late
Who should create a husband list? Anyone woman who is not married should have a husband list.
It's not too late to create your list. It doesn't matter if you've gone from relationship to relationship or if your a candidate for the 20th Duggar daughter, you can start creating a husband today. Divorced? Widowed? 40-something and single? Yep, you too!
If there's potential for you to meet a guy and want to spend the rest of your life with him, you should have a husband list.
Did you create or do you have a husband list? What are some things on your list?
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My husband and I had separately, before we ever met each other, made a ‘spouse-list’ or more precisely a ‘life-mate list’. Our lists were amazingly similar in substance if not in form, and both lists had been adjusted along the way as God had taught us many more lessons. After we married we each separately continued to advise our friends who were single to make their own lists. We both emphasized to our friends that the list need never be shown to another person but that the purpose of the list was so that the individuals would be honest and truthful with THEMSELVES about what they needed and what was really important THEM without taking into account ‘public opinion’. In nearly fourteen years together this has been beneficial for five of our male friends and two of our female friends, resulting in six weddings and one broken engagement as the man realized that the woman was simply not what God had planned for him.